The Moosie Awards 2010

22 12 2010

Since I was a little gay I used to watch and critique US award shows. I can’t say I’ve ever seen a roster of award winners on any of them that made sense commercially or artistically. I’m still stinging from Taylor Swift’s Grammy win last year. So, if only to make balance things out karmically in my musical world, I present the 2010 “Moosies” (why does that sound dirty?).

Best New Artist: While Florence + The Machine’s Lungs came out overseas and crept into the US market in 2009, it was official released and broke big in 2010. Florence’s voice harkens back to vintage Sarah McLachlan (see Vox) or later Siouxie Sioux but does better than both. Along with Beth Ditto, she ushered in new era of girls who can REALLY sing. I mean REALLY. If you’ve not yet, make sure you get Dog Days or Rabbit Heart, two of the best songs of this or any year.

Best Album: Tracey Thorn and Scissor Sisters made the 2 best CDs of their careers this year, but I have to give this one to Robyn for Body Talk. More than any artist in my lifetime she blends pop, dance and intelligence breaking down this hardest hipster heart into whirling dance dervish.

Best Remake: Not In Love by Crystal Castles featuring Robert Smith takes an obscure Canadian hit by Platinum Blonde and transforms it into a manic, urgent and moving synth-pop masterpiece. Also best workout song of the decade.

Best Remix: For a year where dance music seems to have died…again, it was one of the hottest years for remixes. Robin, Gaga and Kylie put out some brilliant mixes by up and comers Aviici, Alphabeat and Monarchy respectably, but the most addicting remix of the year was by genius Fred Falke for Gossip’s Heavy Cross. He completely rethought the song into an early Duran Duran fantasy that built and built until it erupted in a luscious synthgasm.

Best Live Show: a-ha – While Robyn’s show should probably win, I have a soft spot in  my heart for a-ha and this year was their farewell tour and only time we’ll have had to see them live ever again. It was a joyous and moving sold out show at the Riviera. If you missed, you missed it, and you should be sad. Their 25 year career yield far more groundbreaking stuff than Take On Me. And Robyn will be back soon anyway if you’re a fan of hot Scandinavians.

Best Comeback: Kelis hit it strong this year after a career of hits and misses. Getting dumped by NAS and having a baby would make most women get all Lilith Fair, but Kelis amped up the energy and love on her Flesh Tone collection. It’s what we’ve always known she could do.

Most Overhyped: Predictably Taylor Swift. OK songwriter, cute girl, just can’t sing. In the real world she’d be writing hits for better singers.

Most Overrated: Katy Perry. Since her first album, I’ve been waiting for her to show us how good she can be but this is two overhyped, pitiful albums in a row. In fact, Teenage Dream is worse than the first so she’s sliding artistically downhill. Outside the title track, it sounds like she wrote this album with a drunk Ke$ha and a few 5 years olds. “Show me your Peacock, cock, cock”. Really? (This really should have been Ke$ha, but you have to be talked about to be overrated)

Biggest Letdown: So many things I was looking forward to this year that just sucked after all the hype, but none as bad as the David Byrne/Fatboy Slim double CD concept album Here Lies Love. Done as a story of Imelda Marcos, it featured guest vocals by some of the biggest names in the business: Cyndi Lauper, Tori Amos, Natalie Merchant and more but every last track was horribly campy and poorly written. It’s a big of a joke as the theme indicates.

Artist of the Year: Robyn. See album of the year. She did no wrong.

 

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